Casey's Birth Story Part Deux

So sorry to have left you hanging a few days ago with the birth story - we have a very strong growing little man over here who pretty much eats non stop which doesn't give momma a lot of time to do much else but play milk machine - but that's OK I would not have it any other way!

So where did we leave off? Oh yes, the scariest epidural ever. Once they were able to stimulate him from the inside both his heart rate and mine started to rise and it appeared we were in the clear. Daddy came back into the room as they had told him it would be safe to return in about 20 minutes and he walked in to a room full of people and me hooked up to oxygen. Needless to say he was just as scared as I was but I was sort of in shock and couldn't really get out what happened. We never really did get any answers as to why it happened, just that it sometimes does and that now baby looked to be OK. After that though, they encouraged me to sleep and rest but I was having none of it - I was constantly monitoring his heart rate even though I was hooked up to the monitors - it made me feel more comfortable to watch on my own. This was about 6:30 am so I think maybe throughout the morning I was able to snooze and get maybe an hour of sleep or so to prepare to push.

Pre-epidural contractions and laboring

Post epidural contractions and laboring

I really didn't like being confined to the bed and laying on my back but to be honest with you I was completely humbled by the early parts of labor and contractions. I went into it feeling like super woman with no doubt that I could do it and I was so wrong. Labor pains and contractions truly are no joke and any woman that makes it through with no drugs is truly super woman. 

So during this time I tried not to press the epidural button very much as I did want to still feel something. The doc came in probably around 10:30 or so and said we were at 9 cm and should be maybe about another 2 hours before we would start pushing. She came back in a little before noon and told us it was go time and time to push!! We were so naive we thought woohoo - we'll have a baby in no time! Chris asked the doc so how long until you think he's born and she said probably 2-3 hours! We were clueless but so so ready to meet our little nugget!

At our hospital you are not able to take pictures of the actual pushing part - I'm guessing it for liability reasons but can I just tell you it was my favorite part of the entire pregnancy! I stopped pressing the epidural button after we hit 9cm so the pain wasn't excruciating but I definitely knew when the contractions were coming and going. Everytime a contraction would start we would get ready and once we hit the juiciest part of the contraction I would push for 10 seconds, back off, and repeat that 3 times. At this point in time we still had went without augmentation or Pitocin. We pushed for about an hour before the doctor came back in and said 1. she wanted to start a low does of Pitocin to get the contractions closer and more regular and that 2. she had been called in to the OR for an emergency and someone else would be delivering our baby. She wasn't my normal doctor but a doctor I had met during my visits but it turned out to be one of the biggest blessings of the whole day.

So excited it's time to start pushing!

Before we knew it we had Carol Hershfield, a Certified Nurse Midwife come to greet us and check up on us and she said she would love to deliver our baby if that was OK - otherwise she could call a doctor. She and Rita knew one another and she seemed so nice and Chris and I said of course we would love for you to deliver the baby! Best decision ever and we will for sure use her for Baby #2. She stayed with us the entire time we were laboring and was so encouraging and uplifting - between having a great nurse, a very green med student, an amazing midwife and Rita who is seriously a saint and second to none - it could not have been more perfect! During our 2 and a half hours of pushing we talked about all sorts of things from becoming a midwife, to where we were from, to how to cook peeps in the microwave to distort them and blow them up, to my grooming job the morning of delivery and how fabulous it was in comparison to other mommas - TMI I know but totally hilarious! We also talked about when it would be safe to try for #2 - that's how anxious I already am!

As I mentioned before pushing was my favorite part of the whole pregnancy. I knew that every good push was one step closer to my baby and it was a serious adrenaline rush!! I watched a lot of it in the mirror which was amazing but I found that when I wasn't seeing much progress and I could see his head come down but then be sucked back in - it caused the same sort of mental block the doc caused in the beginning by telling me I was only a 3 so I didn't watch for too long. Casey crowned for a good 45 minutes and I truly believe other doctors may have decided an episiotomy was in order, but Carol was so patient and I was able to push him out on my own with zero tearing - zero, zip, zilch, nada. She said I put two little stitches in internally just to leave my initials - but both she and Rita were amazed that I made it to the other side unscathed as was Chris.  Rita mentioned had that been a home birth we probably wouldn't have even stitched anything. 

When he actually was ready to come out they all said reach down and grab him momma! So as he came out I reach down and actually pulled him out - most amazing feeling ever! Of course you all know that from about 14-15 weeks there was zero doubt in my mind he was a boy so as I grabbed him and pulled him up to my check I just started crying and said I knew it, I knew it was you in there Casey! It was simply amazing! I got him on my chest and we planned to delay the cord clamping but he needed a little more help waking up so Daddy had to cut it pretty quickly so they could take him over to the warmer and stimulate him a little more. This was just a few minutes and then he was back on mommy's chest, skin to skin - he was perfect, he was healthy and he was ours.

I cannot even begin to describe to you the feelings and emotions that I felt meeting my son for the first time. The son that for the past few years I thought may never be possible, in that first moment when they put him on my chest I saw his whole life and future in one second. My momma bear instinct kicked in and in one second I knew I would do whatever it takes, for now and for the rest of my life, to protect this little man and give him the very best that life has to offer. I cannot stop staring at him or holding him and this first week has been the most amazing week of my life. The love I see in Chris' eyes for him makes me fall in love with Chris more and more every day - he is an amazing dad already.  I never want to forget any second of those two days of labor and delivery from the second that I told Chris I thought my water was breaking, to the scary epidural situation, to pulling him out for the first time - all of it. This little guy is truly a miracle and he is the best thing we have ever done. 

XOXO

K